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PREPARE FOR A MAMMOGRAM
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This was forwarded to me, I didn't write it BUT I thought it was interesting.
Not sure of the accuracy but...
Think for yourself,
don't let the liberal media brain wash you, your family or your friends...

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The title says it all.   Please share with everyone you know who has or has yet to experience this!

Many women are afraid of their first mammogram, but there is no need to worry.   By taking a few minutes each day for a week preceding the exam and doing the following exercises, you will be totally prepared for the test.   Best of all, you can do these simple exercises right in your home.

EXERCISE ONE:

Open your refrigerator door and insert one breast in door.   Shut as hard as possible and lean on the door for good measure.   Hold that position for five seconds.   Repeat again in case the first time wasn't effective enough.

EXERCISE TWO:

Visit your garage at 3AM when the temperature of the cement floor is just perfect.   Take off all your clothes and lie comfortably on the floor with one breast wedged under the rear tire of the car.   Ask a friend to slowly back the car up until your breast is sufficiently flattened and chilled.   Turn over and repeat with the other breast.

EXERCISE THREE:

Freeze two metal bookends over night.   Strip to the waist.   Invite a stranger into the room.   Press the book- ends against one of your breasts.   Smash the bookends together as hard as you can.   Set up an appointment with the stranger to meet next year and do it again.

YOU ARE NOW TOTALLY PREPARED!   AND just a thought for all the women out there:

MENtal illness,
MENstrual cramps,
MENtal breakdown,
MENopause.....
Ever notice how all of women's problems start with men?
And when we have real trouble, it's.....
HISterectomy!

Send of this to all the women you know and brighten their day!!   AND, don't forget to have a mammogram -- our lives really do depend on it, and the part you play in my life is so valuable that I ask you to endure the pain: your father; your husband; your brother; your boyfriend.... we LOVE you.

 

 

In God We Trust....
GOD BLESS AMERICA !!
and GOD Bless Americans,

AMEN...